Part of what makes me extremely angry about Teacher’s text to me and ups my hostility rate to an all-time high is his fucking ridiculous, disgusting language. Or, more specifically, his fucking ridiculous, disgusting use of language.
I mean, if you discovered that an interaction that you thought was consensual wasn’t consensual to the other person, would you text them and refer to said interaction as “tender exchanges”? Seriously, that makes me want to throw up. Who fucking does that?! I mean, I guess it’s now obvious that it was a “tender exchange” on his end, but who really says that to someone?
Also, the part where he informs me of my consent level instead of actually asking me how I felt (not that I didn’t make that screamingly obvious in my letter to the class) or why I felt the way I do…what the hell?
There is also the part where my question the other day (“How do you feel about what happened the other night after class?”) was so completely side-stepped that I honestly have no idea if he was planning on totally playing ignorant about anything happening at all, or if he was going to acknowledge that something that was (in his eyes) consensual happened if pressed or what.
I’m seeing a lot of words here. Words that at times are so vague as to be open to any interpretation. Then words that sound intimidating, gaslighting, and disgusting.
Tender exchanges. I hope I never read that phrase in a book. It’s going to be a nauseating phrase for me to see or hear for a very long time.